ARSHI FF: Gustakh Dil... (Stubborn Heart)

CHAPTER 16: Dard (Pain)

Sitting on the lonely bench of the deserted park behind the temple, Khushi questioned herself as the office scene played inside her like a broken record as cried saying: “What have I done..? How could I do this..? Jaane anjaane humne Arnav ko unke pyaar se door kar diya and became the reason of his pain. I never wanted that to happen... How could I be so selfish not to have seen that, I mean I’ve seen Arnav-Lavanyaji together before when I was working in AR and how Arnav brought Lavanyaji to live with his family to get her approved by his family, so after all that how could I think that they didn’t love each other? That’s why Lavanyaji is so hurt and sad... How could I be so obvious to this? My parents taught me that true love means giving and scarifying for your loved ones and here I became so selfish and blind in my love that I didn’t see how much hurt the man I love is from losing his love? How did I become the reason for the separation between two people in love? I’m a bad... very very bad person! But not anymore, I’ll make things right which I’ve messed... I would make everything right; I’ll make sure Arnav gets his true love, his Lavanya back. I’ll go away from his life... away from him so he could be with his love. I know at first he’ll feel bad for me but that’s okay I’m sure Lavanyaji with her love would make him forget all about me... then everything would be back the way it should be.” wiping her tears determined said to herself, “Yes, I’ll do the right thing and leave from here forever...”

But thought of going away from Arnav made her heart stop as another round of tears rolled down from her eyes thinking that her love would forever remain unrequited, only console was that she was doing for the happiness of the man she loved... to give him his love back she was stepping aside, cried over her ill fate of unrequited love.












...............................................













Arnav was damn worried as he drove hurriedly to RM as he needs to get to her as soon as possible knowing her state of mind isn’t good, he needs to clear her misconception or whatever is been fed her. He very well knew she didn’t go Lakshmi Nagar. She wouldn’t have gone with Nani, Mami, Anjali and Payal who out gone out to some function of their ladies club, no one was at home except the Prakash brothers and police also hasn’t been able to find her. Right now he was most worried about her being emotionally hurt and she might harm herself in a disturbed state of mind if something happens to her he won’t be able to live.









Reaching RM he jumped out of the car as he stopped at the driveway and rushed inside, calling out loudly looking around fanatically: “HP! HP!”






He saw instead of HP, Anjali walked out of the kitchen towards him smiling replied: “HPji isn’t at home Chotte, he has gone to market. But what are you doing at home at this time Chotte?”







Arnav was surprised seeing Anjali home as he thought she might also be gone to the function with other ladies, he questioned her: “Di you’re at home... Weren’t you supposed to go at some ladies club function..?”







Anjali replied standing in front of him: “Yeah but I feeling nauseous and  well didn’t feel like going anywhere, so stayed at home instead...” giving him a tired smile knowing hearing this her Chotte would get hyper enough to forget everything and start hovering over her which is exactly she wanted. She had thought if she couldn’t directly poison Khushi more than she would do it indirect way portraying that he didn’t care much about finding her even after the sudden disappearance.

Arnav looked at his sister who stood in front of him with pale and tired face giving him a smile which seemed like with too much effort to put on. At any other situation, he would be hovering over his Di but today was just not the situation...right now he just couldn’t think beyond finding his wife. So instead of going to ‘concern-brother-mode’ like usual when he sees his sister even a little unwell, he was still in his ‘desperate-husband-searching-his-wife’ asked her worriedly: “Di has Khushi come home?”

Anjali was little taken back seeing her brother’s lack of concern for her, but none-the-less replied: “No Chotte... why has something happened?”



Arnav worriedly replied: “Di, I can’t find Khushi anywhere... god knows where she went to.” going fanatic with concern for his wife which irked Anjali a lot not being used to Arnav’s ignorance about slightest matter concerned to her.







She was about to say something but Arnav’s phone started ringing as he pulled his phone out and immediately answered it: “Hello Mishti...” hoping it to be Khushi’s call.

But to other side came voice of Aman: “Hello ASR, it’s me Aman.”







Arnav pulled the phone off his ear to glance at the caller-id and then put it back to his ear replied: “Yeah Aman, bolo...” his disappointment laced in his voice.







Aman felt his friend’s disappointment answered: “I just called the commissioner and he said that they couldn’t find any trace of her.  He told me to ask you if you have any idea where she might go in her distress, it would help them rather than doing a blind search.”







Arnav running a hand through his hair replied: “No I don’t have any idea.”  







Aman suggested: “Why don’t you check Bhabhi’s things maybe you’ll find something.”







Arnav instantly agreed: “Yeah, maybe could get something there... I’ll just check it now.” rushing towards his room still talking on the phone.

While Anjali was left ignored which had gotten her frustrated and also not being able to hear what Aman was telling Arnav was irritating her. But could get one thing that they haven’t found Khushi yet which was enough to satisfy her for now. So she happily sat on the couch of lounge area switched on T.V. than going after Arnav to see and wishing that Khushi never returns.







Arnav entering his room with still on phone with Aman spoke: “Aman she is going to be fine, right..? I’m so worried its more than 02 hours she is missing...” as he started searching through the drawers of the bedside table.   






Aman tried assuring him: “Bhabhi is going to be fine ASR, we’ll find her. By the way, I had something to talk to you?”







Arnav asked: “About what?” as he moved to search in their walk-in wardrobe.







Aman carefully said: “I doubt Bhabhi getting so disturbed is only due to today’s incident... I meant whatever she saw today wasn’t the sole reason, I think there is something more.”







Arnav paused for a moment asked: “What do you mean?”







Aman explained: “After you left office, I saw Lavanya with her two minions and when I went near them they were talking about some courier... but they stopped when I asked them. I’m having a suspicion that they did something more than today’s act.”

Arnav who had gotten back searching through Khushi’s side of the wardrobe in hope to find something; said: “Courier..? What courier..? Could they have sent something to Mishti?”

Aman replied: “I don’t know, see if you could find something.”







Arnav frustrated moved to next set of drawers speaking on phone: “Damn it! I’ll kill them for messing up with my life.” in the process he knocked off few dresses from the shelf which he bends to pick and found a big brown mafia envelope too. 



Arnav carefully put the clothes on the shelf carelessly and examined the envelope to see it was addressed to Khushi but had no sender’s addressed told to Aman: “Ah Aman, I guess I found which courier they might be talking about.” 







Aman curiously: “What?”







Arnav replied: “I just found an envelope hidden in-between Khushi’s clothes I guess she hid it from me... and this has no sender’s address.”







Aman: “Open it”







Arnav: “I’m, wait a second.” as he held the phone between his ear and shoulder than emptying the content to see received a fatal shock on finding the photos inside. After that, he read the letter which boiled his blood and also scared him that Khushi is hurt and doubting at him.

Aman impatiently prompted from the other side: “ASR, are you there? ASR what is in the envelope..? Hello ASR?”







Arnav got back to his sense as he clutched the phone tightly in his hand replied Aman gritting his teeth in anger: “Inside it mine and Lavanya’s photos along with a letter which says utter rubbish about me. And this letter was posted 05 days back when Mishti fell sick... mean this letter was the cause of her distress.”

Aman: “Well shit man!”







Arnav gritting his teeth said: “I’m seriously going slaughter the person behind this...” feeling the rage bubbling in him.







Aman tried calming him said: “ASR calm down, we need to find Khushi Bhabhi first right now; we’ll deal with this courier later. Bhabhi must be shattered right now and we need to find her soon... can’t you think of any place she might go?”







Arnav getting back to the urgent matter said: “Let me think...” as he thought of few possibilities and spoke, “Well chances are she might have gone to temple or park, she would want a calm soothing place to pour her sorrows.”







Aman: “Well then we could search the parks and temples she goes and is nearby that area she might be....”







Arnav nodded in agreement said: “Yeah search in Lakshmi Nagar temple and parks also the nearby areas and also near AR Office, I’ll check the other ones.” stuffing the contents back inside the envelope and shove it in his pocket as he needed it to talk about this to Khushi clarifying things between them regarding it.








Aman: “On it Boss, I’ll inform the police... I so want to go searching for Bhabhi but someone is needed in office also in your absence.” signing sadly for not being able to join the search party.







Arnav: “No Aman you stay in office cause you’re needed there right now, I’ll call if I need help.” as he rushed out of the room.



Anjali saw Arnav come running downstairs still on the phone as he passed her but ran out ignore her presence altogether made her anger reach to new heights at that moment. While rushing to his car he continued speaking: “Okay Aman I’ll stay in touch with you and let me know if the police give you a call with any information..." as he got into his car and drove out of RM premises. 

*****














Arnav rushed out of RM to his car and he started the engine as he drove off out of the main gates. His mind was swirling with so many thoughts which were making more worried about Khushi and a desperate need to reach: “God, I was thinking it was only what happened today made her stressed but I never expected something like this... no wonder she is so upset. But why didn’t she tell me anything about that courier..?” and with that what followed were more dreadful lines of thought, “What if she started doubting me..? What if she regrets marrying me... for loving me..? No, it can’t be I know my Mishti and she would never think so low of me... But she is hurt... What if she believed it..? She thinks I’m a cheat and two-timing her, and if she decides to leave me forever... What am I gonna do..?”

His thoughts going haywire, to even imagine a life without Khushi made him suffocate like he couldn’t breathe anymore, almost going into a panic attack he assured himself: “I’ve to find her as possible... I can’t lose her, I can’t let her go!” and still driving he tried calling her but didn't get a response much to his disappointment.

Hours have passed with him driving all around the city searching for Khushi like mad but she hasn’t been seen anywhere. Even the police couldn’t find her yet as he dejectedly walked out of another temple not finding her even there too and got into his car. It was dark now and with each passing minute, his tension was increasing what if something happens to her, as he closed his head in disappointment and suddenly a flashback of a conversation floated to him. He could almost hear her voice saying to him: “Whenever I get upset and want to be alone for crying my heart out, I go this park at the back of that big white Mahadev’s temple...” it was topic of one of their conversations in the evening about what they do when they get too upset while learning more about each other.










Arnav jumped opening his eyes and he quickly dialed Aman's number, saying to him: "I think I know one place she could be Aman and I'm going there right now..." ending the call and started the engine and drove to this new destination in hopes of finding Khushi there. 









He drove as fast as he can and within 15 mins reaching the temple jumped off the car. He ran inside to check first inside the temple if she was there, not finding her there he dashed to the back of the temple leading to the park. When he entered the park, it was deserted and no one seemed to be present and his shoulder slumped in defeat, he didn’t to where to find her anymore and everything seemed pointless without her by his side as darkness surround him as he turned to leave.

There was a moment caught his eyes at the corner of the park which would get into notice immediately to anyone, with curious and hopeful steps he walked closer to the corner bench. As neared his heart started racing like he ran a marathon and there he saw sitting on the bench with her legs folded near her chest with her arms wrapped around her knees was a crying Khushi. 

He felt like he just got his breath back and he breathed out a softly: “Mishti...” making her look up startled, her eyes red, swollen with tears filled which were showing her pain and then stare at him wonder if he is really here or another of her imagination. 

PRECAP : Heart to heart conversation between Arnav-Khushi.